Alas, spring has sprung. The snow has melted. Grass is growing. Stupid Canadian geese are stupidly migrating their stupid way back to the stupid north.

As the Earth begins it annual renewal, so too does a local brewery bring about its own renewal in the form of August Schell Brewing Company’s newest addition to the Grain Belt line, Nordeast. Giving a nod to the predominantly Polish neighborhood that gave birth to the Grain Belt family, Nordeast will be released on Wednesday the 7th, only in NE Minneapolis. You’ll find it at Surdyk’s liquor store and at NE bars and restaurants on the 7th. Wider distribution begins on the 8th.

Grain Belt has been a household name in Minnesota for quite some time. Their history and presence in Minnesota deserves more than I have time to give in this post, but I’ll cover some of the essentials for you. The Minneapolis Brewing Company first created the signature brand in 1893, referring to milling prowess of the Midwest in its name. The current Grain Belt logo featuring a red diamond overlaying a bottle cap premiered in 1938, with the gaining popularity of bottling beers. Not long after, the famous Grain Belt neon sign was erected on Nicollet Island.

Following prohibition and World War II, consumer tastes led the great shift of beer production to the macro-lagers that dominate the market today. In response to demands for a smoother, less intense lager, Grain Belt Premium was released in 1947. Minneapolis Brewing Co became Grain Belt Breweries in 1967, after acquiring several other regional brands of beer. At it’s peak, Grain Belt Breweries was the 18th largest brewer in the United States.

Then came the era of the moving brand. By 1975, the popularity of national brands forced Grain Belt to sell, and by ’76 the new owner closed the brewery’s doors. Brewing of the Grain Belt label moved to G Heileman Brewing Company, and took a back seat to its signature line, Old Style. Heileman fell on hard times in the ’80s and sold the brand to the Minnesota Brewing Company. Premium’s popularity found a resurgence, but that didn’t keep MBC from going bankrupt. Brewing finally moved to its current home of August Schell Brewing Co in 2002.

If we forgive Premium light, Nordeast will be the first new beer with the Grain Belt name in over 50 years. It’s promoted as an “American amber lager,” whatever that means. Presumably, it will have a darker malt bill, leading to a heavier body, and–gasp–a note of hops. If you’ve ever had a Premo, the mention of hops flavor you’ve made is to the lack thereof. And because it is a beer, it will also feature “smooth taste with an excellent drinkability,” because that is an incredibly specific, yet rare quality in the beer world</sarcasm>.

Since we’re all just a bunch of conformists, it might as well be time for Minneapoholics to renew our efforts as well, to bring friends together over good food and drink. To do so, the forth (of hopefully many) Minnepoholics Anonymous support group will be held at Whitey’s World Famous Saloon, at 7:00 pm, Wednesday, April 7th.

(Note: The Library is probably more representative of the campus drinking scene, but you have to worry about catching douchebagitis while drinking your .25¢ miller lites and eating your $2.50 cheeseburgers. Symptoms of douchbagitis include primary, secondary, and tertiary levels of popped collars)

Shrouded in the odd shaped shadows of the McNamara Alumni Center, surrounded by the masses of mediocre chain restaurants, at the heart of stadium village lies Stub and Herb’s, a pacemaker, keeping the neighborhood from flatlining. Underneath its ho-hum brick exterior you’ll find one of the best beer bars in the city, challenged by only a few in the state. Sturb’s excels at every characteristic that makes a bar worthwhile. Let’s break them down one by one:

Facilities: Riddled with U of M and beer paraphernalia, as one would expect from a campus bar. Requisite pool tables, buck hunter, flat screens, and patio fulfill the bar essentials. Highlights include the olde time bar featuring a brass rail and the decked out Surly mural on the patio wall. A+ for the location, C- for the bathrooms.

Atmosphere: A healthy mix of beer appreciation and school pride, a most welcome alternative from the typical campus bar. Crowds are generally mild and usually gopher affiliated, consisting of more grads and professionals than under-grads. Proximity to campus lends to rowdier weekends, especially when one begins exploring the shot list or weather allows for a night on the patio.

Service: Varies. Probably the only category Sturb’s won’t win any awards for. The service is by no means bad, but it doesn’t strike me as anything amazing either. I must give credit, however, that the majority of the staff knows their beer. Kudos to them.

Food: Delicious and fairly priced. The style is typical bar food, heavy on the fried items, plenty of apps and burgers. Highlights include surly marinated roast beef sandwiches, anything with chili, and tater tots. Low lights include the run of the mill pretzels, and genius concept but soggily executed tot-chos. Bonus: half price apps during happy hour.

Drinks: Here, obviously, is the highlight of the establishment. The shots list is in the 70s and the beer selection is phenomenal; Probably two dozen taps, all exceptional, with a heavy midwest focus. The only light beer on tap is Grain Belt Light. The selection also changes with extreme rapidity. You’ll never see the same tap list on any two visits. To back it up, they offer awesome pricing: $5 pints, $6.50 22oz, and $13.50 pitchers on most taps. The cherries on top are the incredible happy hour (11:30-7 and 10-12, every day) and daily specials: $3.50 pints during happy hour and, $5 off pitchers on Wed ($8.50 for 4 pints of Bender?! That’s just over $2/pint).

Beyond selling good beer, Sturb’s actually goes quite the distance to promote craft beer and the enjoyment of said libation. Once a month, Sturb’s holds a beer tasting, hosting a Brewer from a different craft brewery each month. This fall, Sturb’s has also teamed up with local powerhouse Surly to bring a draft truck to provide an endless flow of quality brew to the hordes of Gopher fans outside TCF Bank Stadium.

Again, I wasn’t able to find much historical information on Sturb’s, mostly anecdotal. I do remember, however, that Sturbs has only recently been a craft beer haven. Before its current, beer loving ownership, its owner was some stodgy old lady who hated kids and tried to run for local office. She lost, probably realized she was running a potentially holy grail into the ground, so she passed the torch to the current ownership. At least, that is how I remember it.

To say that I could not find any noteworthy history of Stub and Herb’s is not to say there is none. Stub and Herb’s just recently celebrated their 70th birthday by serving 70¢ Grain Belt Premiums. Their motto is “Your grandpa drank here.” I think they are lying; My grandpa would have been more of a Nye’s man. The motto, however, will most definitely apply to my grandchildren.

(Note: Actually, I think my grandpa would have been more of a VFW man. Okay, he was more like a two fingers of Winsdor Canadian man.)

Thursday, August 20^th 8pm
Stub and Herb’s
227 Oak St
Mpls, MN 55414
(612) 379-0555
website photos

Drinks: Cheap craft beer, lots of shots.
Foods: Typical bar fare done well
Atmosphere: Intelligent yet on campus
Patrons: Mostly gophers, young, old, mostly in between
Distinguishing Marks: Bitchin’ surly mural, campus beer oasis, sweet specials

BeerAdvocate A+ (world class) on 44 reviews
Yelp! rating: 4.5 stars on 13 reviews
Urban Spoon rating: 91% liked on 24 reviews
Decider TC no rating

Extra Tidbit: The bathrooms are in the basements.

BONUS!! I’ll buy a pint for the first person to name (via comment) the speaker in the last photo. Use your name in the comment, so I can award you thusly.

We start our alcoholic and gastronomic journey with an understated bar, a throwback bar, the bar your grandparents probably drank at, and–assuming it remains in business for another 50 years–the bar you grandchildren will drink at. We start our journey at a quintessential Minneapolis bar, Nye’s Polonaise Room.

What makes Nye’s so endearing? Why have its doors been open since 1949? Why, every weekend, does the place pack full with both octogenarians and twenty-somethings? It’s because, amongst many other things, Nye’s refuses to change. Walking through the doors of Nye’s Polonaise Room is akin to digging up your back yard and opening the time capsule you buried ages ago. The walls are covered with tacky wallpaper, the booths are a sparkling gold vinyl, painted glass chandeliers line the ceiling, a photo booth sits in the corner, and piano and/or polka music frequently lofts through the pirogi scented air. Also, Roger Normandin is probably the only house dance partner in any bar anywhere^[1]. Roger has been acting as the stand in dance partner on Nye’s polka floor for over 15 years, dancing with whomever needs or wants a partner. Apparently the bar offers him free coffee for his services^[2].

Nye’s is so resistant to change many of the employee’s are on their third or fourth decade of employment. Apparently the only thing that changes regularly is the drummer for The World’s Most Dangerous Polka Band^[2], the house band that can be heard every Friday and Saturday night (since our initial trip will be on a Tuesday, a return trip may be necessary).

My research resulted in more anecdotal history than actual milestones for the establishment. The bar was founded the “Nordeast” neighborhood of Minneapolis in 1949 by Al Nye^[1], whose picture adorns the wall of the eponymous bar. It was sold to a pair of brothers sometime in 2002, presumably from Al himself. Thankfully, the brothers have left the decor and operations unchanged^[2]. Why change a winning lineup? And a winning lineup it certainly is, as Esquire magazine named Nye’s “The Best Bar in America” in 2006^[2] (great accompanying article, by the way). Besides those few stats, there isn’t so much to tell someone about Nye’s as there is to be experienced. This kind of legend is better learned first hand.

Normally, I would like to list the specials, drink prices, other menu items that make a place like Nye’s unique. Visiting Nye’s website however, only offers the bar’s contact information and the title, “The Best Bar in America.” This probably a fitting website for such a legend, again better experienced in person. I can imagine their staff saying, “Wanna know what da hoopla’s all about der? Den getchure fanny over here.” I’ve heard mixed reviews of the food, but I remember it being polish and edible (I was twelve). Supposedly the pirogies, Polish platter, or the prime rib are the way(s) to go. At any rate, here is how Nye’s would look on paper if their were a bar stat sheet:

Nye’s Polonaise Room
112 E Hennepin Avenue
Mpls, MN 55414
(612) 379-2021
website photos

Drinks:
Foods: POLISH
Atmosphere: POLISH
Patrons: universal, but heavily proportioned with Nordeasters (young and old)
Distinguishing Marks: Piano karaoke, polka music, old school decor, named “The Best Bar in America” buy Esquire, POLISH!

Yelp! rating: 4.5 stars on 64 reviews
Urban Spoon rating: 86% liked on 60 reviews
Decider TC rating: A- on 3 grades

Extra Tidbit: Polish Americans represent the 5th largest population in Minnesota, at 5.1%. With an estimated population of 5,197,621, that means about 265,079 people of Polish descent live in Minnesota. (By comparison,the population of Minneapolis is about 377,392)^[3][4].

Sources:

1. Trompeter, Jeanette. “Finding Minnesota: INside Nye’s Polonaise Room.” WCCO. 26 June 2006. CBS Broadcasting Inc. 22 June 2009. <http://wcco.com/findingminnesota/Nye.s.Polonaise.2.359657.html>.
2. Jones, Chris. “The Best Bar in America.” Esquire. 1 October 20006. Hearst Communications. 22 June 2009. <http://www.esquire.com/features/ESQ1006BESTBARS_147>.
3. “Poland.” Wikipedia. 21 June 2009. Wikimedia Foundation Inc. 22 June 2009. <http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Minnesota>.
4. “Minnesota.” Wikipedia. 19 June 2009. Wikimedia Foundation Inc. 22 June 2009. <http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Minneapolis>.

Several like-minded individuals and I charge most around us fail to recognize the importance of the establishments which they frequent, often electing proximity in lieu of quality. The history and character of the Twin Cities drives us to explore further than our own backyards. No amount of food shall extinguish our hunger, nor drink extinguish our thirst, when we compromise quality for convenience.

With the aide and inspiration of my colleagues, I propose the creation of a sovereign beer drinking organization. As of yet, this collective has no formal structure, definitive membership, nor modus operandi. What we have however, is a set of common inspirations: the consumption of quality food, the quaffing of diligently crafted beverages, the company of welcoming friends, and the atmosphere that can only be provided by the most legendary establishments of the Twin Cities.

While the formation of this co-operative is still in its infancy, ideas are assuredly being transformed into reality.

Some have colloquially referred to this group as the “Anti-Beer Club.” The club shall meet on a regular basis, and I will make an earnest effort to document its travels. [UPDATE: The name "Minneapoholics Anonymous" has received positive criticism from founding members. 6/21/09]

Acting of my own accord, I have created a list of the legendary, historic, and reputable bars, restaurants, clubs, pubs, and eateries in Minneapolis and St. Paul that in someway provide the ambiance this group demands. This list is formed on my own interpretation of this group’s goals, and is meant to be a launching point for the group as oppose to a definitive list of worthwhile establishments.

An important pillar of this group is the company it keeps. The group shall be welcoming at all times; Snobbery and douchebaggery shall be defended against at all costs. Membership should be defined in the loosest possible terms, and anyone willing to enjoy themselves and others will be welcomed with open arms.

Yes, I realize everything I just wrote is incredibly nerdy and ridiculous. Sobriety makes one do crazy things.